Stop Coping, Start Growing and Thriving
Craig Dial 
You practice many rules designed to stop the world from happening. You’re choosing the Control Cycle to try to stop future events from happening. It doesn’t work. 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗺 It doesn’t work because it doesn’t solve the real problem. The real problem is that you feel blocked from being able to have what you … Read more
Find yourself catastrophizing and coping when you are faced with an upset or problem? Find yourself looking at all the ways things can go wrong? Jump to the worst possible outcomes, regardless of how likely or unlikely they might be? How This Shows Up Screw up at work and immediately focus on being fired? Get … Read more
To who and what did you show Intention and attention last week? Think about your last week and what you spent your time on. For the causes, purposes, initiatives. projects – were any of them yours, or did they start with and belong to someone or something else? Pursuing a shared vision can be powerful. … Read more
One hurdle that people learning to practice Responsibility stumble on is the feeling that taking 100% Ownership means “being at fault.” You’re conditioned by cultural norms and past experiences to believe in “justice” as an assignment of fault and consequences: These structures and programs reinforce your natural coping strategies of Lay Blame, Justify, Shame, and … Read more
Do you work for a company that claims “Our people are our foundation”? Maybe it’s that “People are our biggest asset” or phrased in another fashion. “Our heart is our people” perhaps? All of these sound noble and high-minded. Does your lived experience match? For many, unfortunately, no. All of these metaphorical framings betray themselves. … Read more
What’s the difference between “acting responsible” and being Responsible? Ownership. 100%. It’s about your actions being 100% your full and free choice, or being made to meet an external standard that lets you give ownership away. “Acting Responsible” “Acting” responsible is often “doing the right thing.” According to what standard? Who’s making the call on … Read more
There is no “You must be this tall to ride this ride” requirement for Responsibility. No apprenticeship. No “dues.” 10,000 hours not mandatory. You’ve already had many moments in your life where you’ve operated from the mental position of Responsibility. You may not have called it by that name. You faced a problem, you looked … Read more
How people talk about problems reinforces coping, not solving and growing. Consider: “My car broke down, so now I have to deal with that.” That’s pretty common language. And it’s not “wrong” or “bad.” It encourages reacting to that situation – All of these are you “at effect.” Something happens to you, and you’re the … Read more
There’s always an opportunity, a chance to “change your life,” a hot new thing. Many of those are exploiting your desire to have pain stop, or have a simple solution to all your problems. Focusing on “making things stop” is a coping strategy. Your brain and energy get anchored to thinking about the thing you … Read more
