Stop Coping, Start Growing and Thriving
Coping is protesting reality and being trapped in the past. The mental states described in The Responsibility Process® reveal this. Laying Blame is a protest that your current reality isn’t fair. Someone else did this, or caused it, or took your credit. They have to fix it because it didn’t turn out how you wanted … Read more
Big changes often come with “marching orders” and “because I said so.” Get past that to unlock important context.
You are bigger than any problem that occurs in your life. There are a lot of problems that don’t feel that way. Problems that feel as big as the world, sometimes. How can you really be bigger than all that mess? What’s the real problem? You, like most humans, make space in your head for … Read more
Stop and think about it – what did you scold yourself for today? When did you tell yourself you were “wrong” or did that “badly”? “I’m such an idiot.” Why? What’s the payoff? It’s a coping strategy, it makes accepting the problem easier because you can tell yourself you’ll “do better next time.” Or perhaps … Read more
Think about a moment where someone in authority or power made a demand of you. That moment may have happened as recently as this morning. Maybe it was changing a project scope or direction, or “asking” for a chunk of work to get done by a seemingly arbitrary deadline. Or any one of countless demands … Read more
Have you ever played games that feel like you’re just “so close” to winning, and then the wrong thing happens? You get the wrong shaped blocks, or the wrong multiplier pops up, or some other ‘unlucky’ event. How about slot machines? Just seems like you’re almost about to win? These are both variables reward systems … Read more
Do you struggle at times to see more than one or two options for a decision? You’re likely stuck in a coping mental state, and it’s blocking your thinking. No? Filters Coping states of mind block your ability to consider any solution that doesn’t match that state. It’s a filter that you don’t realize is … Read more
Do you become more capable by “should-ing” on yourself?
Does feeling like you’re constantly doing things you “have to” create the results you want?
Ever think about leaving the place you’ve been working? End up singing The Clash in your head? “Should I stay or should I go now?” Sometimes you’ve left. Others, you’ve stayed. It can be hard to know what you want to do. There are benefits to knowing all the people, the products, the company. And … Read more
Is your Friday anticipation about fun, or about escaping? That could be a sign of feeling Obligation – “have to, don’t want to.” Learn how to turn that back into freedom, choice, and power.